I saw this statement on Twitter a few weeks ago and immediately I wanted to challenge it. It's a statement that should be exercised, but some people don't follow this concept.
Here's the statement: "As long as you stay the same person I fell for, my feelings won't ever change."
Sometimes we catch ourselves wanting to be in a relationship with someone based on their status and/or popularity. We see someone have a lot of followers on Twitter and on Instagram, we see them getting retweeted, favorites, and likes and from that bases, we think they are WORTHY. And most of the time, that's a good correlation - a person's popularity on social media can lead to them being a good person, well liked, and attractive.
But what happens when you get into a relationship with this type of person? Now all of a sudden you can feel insecure, you see the many likes, you see the comments and you get angry or jealous that people are still liking their pictures.
Maybe the person you are with is kind hearted and willing to help others, so he/she goes and helps a friend in need. But you get jealous of that because it may lead to something more. Maybe the person you are with goes out and has fun but you get angry because they are having fun without you.
So sometimes if you stay the same person I fell for, then my feelings will change. So if you fall for someone, understand why you fell for them and be aware of the pros and cons. Know what you sign up for when you get into a relationship. If you can handle it, if your LOVE does not turn into JEALOUSY and ANGER, your mutual love will be everlasting.
Just a reminder, all my blogs are opinionated and not factual based. They are situational based. I have seen this happen to people and I have seen relationships turn out this way. I am not saying this has or will happen to you.
Having said that, I want to get into the qualities of love. There are many qualities but I tend to focus on 4 when it comes to love with my family and friends: Love is kind, love is patient, love is NOT jealous, love is NOT arrogant.
Being kind to someone is being happy and making them happy. If you are not happy with the person you "love", you don't have love. If you can't make that person you are with happy, then you don't have "love". I've learned that the biggest goal in a relationship, is to make sure I'm happy and make sure my girlfriend is happy. I was in a long distance relationship for my first 2 years of college. In October of my junior year, my girlfriend at the time called me wanting to break up. She told me she stressed out from worrying about me and wondering if I'm cheating on her and she just wasn't HAPPY. When she told me she wasn't happy, I left it at that, I left it with a clean break. Overall, I want someone to be happy, even if it is not with me. If I'm with someone, and they strongly feel they can be with someone better, who can make them happy, I encourage that. As we realize, sacrifice is involved in a lot things, and sacrifice is involved when pursuing happiness.
Being patient falls hand in hand with being slow to get angry. One thing I try to work on now is that I don't get mad at my friends. Even if I think they did something wrong, I am not one to judge that. What I do is I let my friends know how highly I think about them and the good qualities they have. From there, my ideal response from them is to live up to those qualities.
For example, I have been told that I am trustworthy and dependable. I've been told that I am unselfish, a good friend, a good coach. And I'm proud of these comments towards me. But I don't respond to them by thinking I've proven myself worthy. I got to keep proving these qualities everyday. If people think highly of me, I'm going to prove them right, not have them regret what they told me.
Another thing about patience is knowing that it will get better. Maybe you are in a rough patch but if you mutually love each other, it will get better. Be that person that truly loves someone no matter what and that you will help them through everything; the good, the bad, the ugly.
For me, I can't stand it when love turns into jealousy because that is not love at all. Jealousy is thee most UNNECESSARY emotion to have, we don't need it! We can remove jealousy out of our lives and live an improved life. Always look to encourage and support your loved ones when you have a desire to feel jealous. Turning your intended jealousy into encouragement and support, will go a long way.
Love is definitely not arrogant. When you love someone you don't look to please yourself first. You look to please the person you love and in exchange, they will so the same. There is no scoreboard, don't keep score on who does more for the other. The love between two people creates a team, and that team has two MVPs. If you only have one MVP, then the team chemistry will mess up to where it could lead to a break up.
Now I came up with this upcoming statement a few days ago and I'm sure the women are going to love this: Men can act as the devil of love.
Explanation of this, again it is situational not factual. So what a man can do in order to manipulate a woman, is to give a woman something they WANT or NEED.
So maybe a man buys you that purse you've always wanted, or those shoes you've been dying to have, or you're at a club and he buys your drinks. So what this guy turns into, is the guy that gets you want you want.
So you become attached to this man. And in order for the man to get what he wants, is to use the false (i.e. devil's) definition of LOVE. He tells you that he can promise a fulfilling life, he can buy you anything you want, he can tell you that you won't have to work another day in your life. And at first, it does sound promising. But what about that emptiness in your soul, where you had a passion. Maybe it was teaching, maybe it was becoming a lawyer, maybe it was helping others and changing lives. The man you are with took that away from you.
What if that man cheats on you? And you have no leverage because you gave up everything to be with them. So he feels he has power over you. Overall, men can get you to believe in false love to where your passions and morals and self respect go down the drain.
To finish, I want to quote a song that I encourage you all to listen to. It's called "Love" by Jaeson Ma featuring Bruno Mars
"Now Hollywood wants to make you think they know what love is. But I'm a tell you what true love is. Love is not what you see in movies. It's not the ecstasy, it's not what you see in that scene. You know what I mean? I'm telling you right now, true love is sacrifice. Love is thinking about others before you think about yourself. Love is selfless not selfish. Love is God and God is love. Love is when you lay down your life for another. Whether for your brother, your mother, your father or your sister. It's even laying down your life for your enemies. That's unthinkable, but think about that."
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